Consider it Done

Welcome to my newly, and more appropriately, named blog: Shtusim (loosely translated as "Sillinesses").

I haven't written a blog for over a month. I decided to go into semi-retirement to see what would happen. Turns out, nothing. I wasn't exactly innundated with calls, faxes or emails asking why I haven't posted in such a long time. In fact, I think someone mentioned something to me once a few weeks ago. But that could have been in relation to something else, I don't recall.

When discussing the blogging issue with my wife, she asked me if I think that I'll go back to writing. I told her that I might. At least it amuses me. Self-entertainment is important when you have no TV - and blog-writing is much more neighbour freindly than yodelling. Anyway, I said that I'll post something soon and to consider it done.

And it struck me. "Consider it Done" is a statement that really makes very little sense.

Mr President: "Kill Ossama!"
General: "Consider it done"

Yeah, right.

or

"Could you please fasten the safety rope to my bungee jumping harness?"
"Sure. Consider it done."

Result: splat.

So, in other words, when you say "Consider it done", what you are actually offering the other person is an alternate reality where you don't actually have to go ahead and do something. All you have to do is consider it done and, whalla, it is.

Not surprisingly, I much prefer the alternate reality approach to the realistic approach. Consider the following: "Did I take out the garbage? Nah. Just consider it done and it will be. Anyway, I'm busy writing emails to my boss telling him that all those projects he asked for are to be considered done....Yes, I know our anniversary is coming up. I didn't buy you a gift. Tell me what you want me to buy for you and just consider it done - like the candle-lit dinner for two in an expensive restaurant. Consider that done, too. I have already considered the Visa card bill paid, so I hope you enjoyed your meal as much as I did..."